Tuesday, May 3, 2011

The "Truth" About Finding Bin Laden

Sometimes I’m so prescient I have to kick myself. No doubt, you are all thinking the same thing. As you recall from my review of the movie version of Ayn Rand’s “Atlas Shrugged” a week ago:

I’m sure the military right now is playing this movie to suspect terrorists at Gitmo to get them to confess. Where water-boarding failed, this horrible excuse for a movie may well succeed. In the name of humanity, we need to find a more humane form of torture.

I’m not going to speculate on whether my review planted the seed. We’ll stick to the facts: According to information I am making up as I am going along, five minutes into the most crapitudinally piece of shit movie of all time, the Gitmo prisoners en masse spit up the location of Bin Laden. I am told they sang like the Mormon Tabernacle Choir.

Think about it. Ten years - nothing. What was different this time? I rest my case. I’m using the same Fox News disregard for facts and reason, so the infallibility of my conclusion is beyond reproach.

Of course, the same people demanding Obama’s birth certificate are now demanding Osama’s death certificate. Oy! You just can’t win with these nut jobs.


I have never wished anyone dead, but I have read some obituaries with great pleasure. - Mark Twain

To the families of the 9/11 victims, a moment of observance. To the men and woman who serve, my heartfelt gratitude.


Tony Previte said...

Here's a GREAT technique!

Ask a question, see what happens and then observe.

No force necessary. EVER!

Maybe the "Men Who Stare At Goats" weren't that crazy after all.

John McManamy said...

Hey, Tony. I think that's called "listening." I am vaguely familiar with the concept, but my understanding is it fell out of favor years and years ago. The "proper" way to have conversation is that you start talking until you say a keyword that prompts me to interrupt with something completely different that does not acknowledge any word you said other than the keyword.

Thus, if you say "Men Who Stare at Goats," I will say that goat cheese really works well on a pizza and start talking about the pizzas I make. You, in turn, will be prompted by a keyword to talk about yourself. On and on it goes.

All this avoids the inconvenience of people meaningfully engaging with one another and learning to care about one other.

Shouting each other down and hurling abuse is also highly valued in this society. I am told this serves a purpose as people feel good doing this.

I am sure this is true. To date, I have simply breathed through my nose when some idiot spouts on about ObamaCare. One day, I will actually tell one of these fucking assholes what is really on my mind and - trust me- it will make my day.

It's no coincidence that I do not have a TV in the house or a radio. That constant yammer-yammer-yammer in my ear is a supreme form of torture to me. (But I do admit I miss Charlie Rose.)

Anyway, hope to talk with you soon over pasta and spumoni. :)

Tony Previte said...

I hear you on the TV and radio. I just downgraded from a million channels of crap to just a few that I like. I'm starting to understand why my elders called it the "idiot box". Never thought I'd hear myself say THAT!

John McManamy said...

Hey, Tony. Come to think of it, our parents must have grown up in a much quieter world, and our grandparents an even quieter one. Everywhere we go, we get squawked at. Then - I really don't understand this - we allow ourselves to get squawked at in our own homes. Whatever happened to the beauty of silence? No wonder the world is nuts. :)

wildflowersandweeds said...

Touché! John, I haven't gone anywhere, I'm listening and learning from your ever present knowledge...and your wisdom speaks louder than the rhetoric of today. I just finished 4 semesters--social work, political science--I now KNOW I am not so nuts after all. Carry on my friend.

John McManamy said...

Hey, wildflowers. So good to hear from you again. Sounds like you're very busy and doing well. Keep us posted. :)